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How to forget someone you love?

Written By

Mari Lyles

CEO of Renewing Relationships

Briefly Speaking

You can feel like your life has ended; and to be real, a part of it has. But you must move on! Read on to see how to forget someone you love.
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Neil Sedaka’s Billboard Hot 100 hit, Breaking Up is Hard to Do, was a scorcher in 1962, sitting atop the charts at No. 1 and scoring world-wide.  It was translated into several foreign languages and re-recorded by Sedaka in 1975 and several other pop artists over the years.

The music was catchy on the first song, and more slow and mellow on Sedaka’s second recording of his song.  But what grabbed the listener and propelled the song into its meteoric rise throughout the world was the sentiment, the universally felt, underlying pathos which normally accompanies any break-up with someone special to your heart.

If you’ve ever had the misfortune of regrettably ending a loving  relationship with someone you cared about, then you’re fully aware that breaking up sucks.  Heck, I’ve broken up with several cats I had and that sucked, so human break-ups tend to hurt perhaps a million times more.  You can get listless, depressed, scarf down a whole tub of Hagen-Daz, or a whole bag of Doritos, or not eat for days on end.  You can bore your friends with all the good times you and “Bob” previously shared, or totally isolate yourself and not talk to anyone.   You can feel like your life has ended, and to be real, a part of it has.  You can wallow in that for days and weeks, OR, you can pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and rejoin the human race.  Learn how to forget someone you love, and move on.

Please choose the latter, because reliving that searing, knife-in-the-heart emotion is so detrimental to your well-being . . . it really is.  Let’s look at ways to move on:

Allow Yourself to Grieve

You’ve lost someone.  You’ve lost your Smoochy-Face, your Honey-Bear, your Boo.  It’s over.  Allow yourself to curl up on your bed and cry until your eyeballs feel like they’re about to drop out.  Give yourself one good week of crying, sniffing, boo-hoo’ing and just plain ole feeling miserable.  One Week.  Granted, you’re probably not going to feel healed after one week, but lying around depressed as hell for any longer than that is not good.  You can still grieve, but grieve on your feet.  Get up.

Forgive Him and Yourself

If there is any amount of hatred inside you toward him, even an infinitesimal amount, do try to forgive.  Forgiveness really isn’t about the other person, it’s all about you – you letting go of old, ugly hurtful feelings so that you can live again – so you’re not tied to the past.  And definitely forgive yourself for any mistakes you made.  No one’s perfect no matter how much we think we are.  You’re not the first and certainly not the last to make mistakes in a relationship.  Don’t be hard on yourself.

Life Offers Lessons – Always

Look at the whole relationship objectively if you can (I know that’s hard, but put on your Big Girl panties and just do it).  What mistakes did you make?  What would you have done differently?  What LESSON did you learn from this?  Was it that relationships take a TON of work?  Was it that you need to pick your battles?  Could it have been an excess of jealousy?  Or, perhaps, an inability to listen more attentively?  Perhaps, it was something positive such as, “I’m worth more than I’m being given credit for and I need someone who will appreciate me.”  If that’s it, then you get major applause!

Really Let Go

Often times, there is such an urge to “be friends.”  Just give each other a call every now and then to “see how you’re doing.”  Uh-huh!  Let go.  Breaking up is hard enough.  Keeping the person around, even if just on the periphery of your life is much harder.  I want to see Bob; no I really shouldn’t;  but. . .  maybe. . .  just to see his face.   Let.It.Go.  Let’s face it, you’re vulnerable.  You need your space.  And your space should exclude him, his friends, his family, his dog, his cat and his pet Gerbil.  Do not tweet him, Facebook him, or technologically contact him in any way.

Cleanse your home of every vestige of him.  If he left sweaters, an old pair of sneakers or a toothbrush at your place, mail them to him.  Have a friend hold on to any special pictures or memorabilia that you feel you can’t destroy, until you’re strong enough to deal with them.  DO NOT read all his old letters and cry yourself to sleep.

And, if you really want to let go of it all, think about the yucky stuff he did – he was cheap, he snored like a buffalo, he was obnoxious at your parent’s house, he didn’t like the way you dressed, he ignored your birthday (anniversary, etc.).  Don’t get too into that or you’ll feel resentment.

Stay Active – DO NOT VEG-OUT

As you learn how to forget someone you love, there are about a gabillion feelings twirling around.  Your emotions seem to be either on fire, or dead.  You want to cry, you want to scream out of anger.  Emotions can and will catch up with you and do a number on you, if you let them.  Stay active.  Find a physical activity which lets you put all those emotions out there, but in a constructive way.  Take Salsa lessons, go roller-blading, join a gym. For those more cerebral, go to a spa and get the whole zen treatment.  Let a masseuse knead you and rub you and massage all those worries away.  But don’t, for goodness sake, stay alone until you’ve gotten over your funk.

Talk to Your Closest Friends

Hopefully, you didn’t neglect all your friends while you were tied up with “Bob.”  Talk it out and listen as they give their opinions.  Hear what they have to say.  It doesn’t mean they’re right – doesn’t mean they’re wrong.  But gain whatever insight they may have on the situation.

I began with a song, so I’ll end with a song -- the lyrics from Fergie’s "Big Girls Don’t Cry":

"And I’m gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I’ve got to get a move on with my life

It’s time to be a big girl now

And big girls don’t cry

Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry"

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4 Reader Comments Share your thoughts.

    Amanda 28 weeks ago
    Many people might think Africa does not possess magical powers while others might think Africa possess powerful magical powers but what i am about to share through this article of my testimony is of a truth, Africa possess world potent magical powers. But like the old sayings of the wise, before someone finds something that is good, it takes a little while and moreover, anything good always has duplicate which is why persons in need of help to various problems should always look down carefully before knowing righful source of help because today, there are many sources of help but only few are true sources as we humans cannot cheat nature; it is always like that. And magic and spells is something powerful and sometimes dangerous that we shouldn't toil with, if you know you ready and prepared to have your problems get solved, then you go for help but if one knows he isn't prepared or ready, then i beg you, don't embark on finding solution to your problems as one might add problem to his problems. But all the same, magic and spell is something good because it works fast and is reliable. Another important thing i have come to realize is Nothing good comes easy, there are many people who thinks getting solution to their problems is something you tell a magical lord and then help comes at once, there are tasks obtainable to we in need of help before solution comes and when we accepts this fact; then i don't see reason why help won't come but the fact is there are right and wrong sources of help but solution only comes when we contact rightful sources and i pray you find rightful sources of help.
    Well, I am Amanda Cordoba and my problem was something intensifying. It was a curse that lead to death of whosoever i love. How it happen was, my mom before her death was banished because she practised magic and her husband who supposed to be her joy because of the fact that she was a witch, also deserted her the time she needed him most because as at that time according to history; i was in her {that is she was Pregnant}. So, when it was time to deliver me, she was alone and then in the process, she hated man and out of anger, she placed a curse upon me which she thought was a blessing by saying "No man will ever know me to talk of punish me with love". So that was it, when i became grown up, no matter how i want to be friends with especially male, they ignore me but there was one who loved me and i also loved her but a week to our marriage, he died because of the curse. This was my pain and agony because i wanted to be like other of my mates who were in their matrimonial home but mine case was a different one.
    So, while i search for solution to this problem, i was adviced and counseled but still, the curse was still there and i was frustrated and lonely and then on a night, i had a dream in which HOODOO SPELLS AND MAGIC was revealed to me as the only source that could help me and i then in the morning of it, searched for Hoodoo spells and magic on the internet but to no avail, i inquired from my friends online and my guardian but they never knew any thing like that. I gave up but on a great morning as i checked my email, behold i received a mail from hoodoospellcasts@outlook.com telling me my story and promising to help me and within 7 days, this curse was broken and today, i am free and i am married.

    If you are in one or two problems with your life or perhaps you need help to that ugly situation, or perhaps you need help retrieving your lover back no matter how long it might be; then this is your opportunity to send email to hoodoospellcasts@outlook.com and i pray that you will be helped.............
    Mackenzie Mason 30 weeks ago
    How do you see spell casting? As a fake thing, as a story or maybe as an ideal part of an imagination?Before you finally conculde on how you see or what you thing i will advice that you conduct a research and i mean a good research on spell casting and its history then maybe then you will finally come to know the true power of spell casting that we all underrate.I once had and shared this logical believe before fate fate and my marriage problem made me realize that spell casting is as real as a baby coming out of vagina.In the sense that as impossible as it may seem to you there is a 90% certainty that it works and works well.But you should know there are some fake among the real and honest ones.I was so fortunate to meet a real and honest one just as i thought to give spell casting a shot.H is all over every blogging page and broken relationship sites MUTTON OSUN.MUTTON OSUN IS ONE OF THE GREATEST THERE IS.I am not just trying to make you fell like you must contact him , is only trying to express how excellent is work is.Trust me i experienced it first hand.Having a sex addicted as a husband is worse than having a cheating husband.Knowing that he loves you with all hes got but can help but can to cheat on you.I know some will rather suggest a rehab , but just to clear the air he checked into rehab four times and was discharged with a report saying he was well but really outside rehab he was back to being an addict of sex.I hated to see that my husband never stopped loving me but couldn't help but but to cheat on me.W had four kids two teens and two other young one age five and seven.It will be ugly to know that there father i a sex addict that can't help but to cheat on me and still dear to say he love me.Only understood but it as all the same tearing my home down just thing about my husband making love to random women that is not me.We could even had gotten infected with some deadly S.T.D or S.T.I i was ready to live him and take my children along with me.But living the man i love just cos he had a problem was coming to hunt me for he rest of my life so by miracle or by fate rather i read about MUTTON OSUN on the internet.I read about like ten article about how he saved so many people marriages and relationships though my case was different i just felt like he can help me.I just had to let all my thought about spell casting go and i brought myself to contact him.It cos of MUTTON OSUN my husband is back to how i and even himself want him to be i mean making love to no other woman but me.I just need some material that he asked me to bring to cast the spell.Believe me it will be better for you to ask him to get the materials for you off course with the money you will be sending cos looking for it yourself will be a total waste of time resources and even energy.you should know you must trust him.What ever he ask you to bring just provide it cos his reason are aretrue.At a time i felt like he was trying to me extort me but i turned out that i was wrong he made understand he was only trying to help complete the worked i asked him to help me do.All thank to the spell prepared by MUTTON OSUN it save my marriage and family.I will live his email address here for you to contact him for help of any sort.godsofosunx@rocketmail.com
    Ian Blake 31 weeks ago
    Reading Eva-Yolanda article about a spell caster namely Mutton Osun was, i will say the best that ever happen to me this year based on the fact that i had a lot problem that i was trying to over come.I had problems at home which affected my work greatly. I was now always in a cross fire with my boss.I really don't want to tell story here so i guess i would just go strange to the point on what i have to say.My wife wanted out of our marriage for no just reason.We were married for four year and i think we were happy though we had no kids, it was her idea not to have any cos she wasn't ready to be a mom yet and i was okay with it i mean i didn't like the idea but i went along with it just to please her.It was always like that i mean she always get what she wants.All i wanted was to see her happy i could never do anything that will make her so unhappy.This was all i did wrong that is make her have it her way all the time. I mean that was the reason she gave during our therapy session.She wanted out of the marriage cos i was to nice. From what she said, i was the kind of man ever woman will die for but she wanted a real man to enforce his will no her meaning was i was to week a man for her.And that was the least of therapy session we had cos like she said we where wasting our life together and no amount of therapy was going to get us back together.I was a total mess thinking of how i was being dumped based on how much i loved my wife and how good i treated her,I really didn't know if she was ungrateful or just confused about what she wanted that is mid-life crisis but the bottom line is that she left me and who knows maybe for another man.I was still in love with her, she was the love of my life and i still wanted her to come back that was when i saw Eva-Yolanda article on Mutton Osun.When i contacted him he made me known that i will have to go through all the spell casting process.Like he said most people are too scared cos of trust issues.I had trust issues, but getting my wife back was my ulterior motive and from my experience with Muton Osun i can tell you he is 100% truthful and honest with his customer.I was asked to get some material to prepare the spell and after which he sent me a package contain the spell and the rest just happen the way it was suppose to happen i got my wife back and she was my wife back again i mean she was not that woman who wanted a hard man she was woman i fell in love with who loved me cos i am me.If you want help or fell he can help contact him with his email address godsofosunx@rocketmail.com